Why does the expression “Falling in Love” seem so closely attuned to the experience of falling in love?
What is this falling, and where does it lead?
Who is the one falling and what is the love?
It could be that the process of Falling in Love is a godly process – impacting far more than the classical hook of romance and leading us far further than any human coupling.
In conventional terms, it could be far easier to fall in love with the guy or girl next door than with your own anger, ambition, freckles or state of negativity. In practice, when we fall in love, we are also falling in love with all of that.
Love is an infinite, universal aspect of existence and you are, at the core, pure existence in a world of form. If you look for a “thing” which is love, you will not find it. If you search for a love that you can hold, keep, control, it will fly away and you will be left defending an idea.
Love, as an absolute aspect of who you are, cannot be controlled, married or banished. All we can do with love is allow it. Its task is to move over the rifts that divide us in a constant reminder of unity. The blocks in feeling, such as pain, emotion or grief, are actually composed of frozen particles of love. When we allow love to approach and invite them, through the perceptive window of awareness, they awaken and melt, moving and transforming back to source.
This is logic. Why would we be in pain if we did not care, if love was not thwarted? The key is for our conscious minds to choose to allow the movement of love, even to our deepest precincts of despair, without agenda, simply to allow love to also be there. The alchemy of inner wholeness begins when we truly and consistently choose to allow love.
And who is the one that allows, the one that falls ecstatically in love?
The Beautiful Fall
I
Consciousness
We tend to direct our lives through our thoughts, and from our heads. This is the perceptive window of consciousness – that which engages with the world of form and protects it.
Consciousness shows us where we physically begin and where we end. It keeps us “safe”. It tells us where we are in time – either during our waking hours or at stages of our life time. Consciousness affirms form, and seeks to protect it. Constantly imprinted with memory which it organizes as patterns and habits, consciousness is the creator of an illusory template through which we live our lives and choose direction. Consciousness builds ourselves a shield of a false self, in order to protect us from pain.
When consciousness develops, it is able to unhook as easily as it hooks. In this, the protection is realized as no longer essential, or even, as a redundant mask. As consciousness becomes free, we become empowered in our choices as the object of engagement loses its absolute grip.
And regardless of our spiritual practice, consciousness is often free: in the silence, in the space between words and thoughts, or at those times when we are “relaxing” allowing ourselves to glide beyond dictate.
AM
Awareness
Falling in love involves a drop in perception from the window of consciousness to that of awareness. Awareness is the dimension of sentience, or pure feeling. When we fall in love, the heart opens and at the early stages the love is unconditional. Everything and everybody becomes lovable. We become suddenly soft. We fall out of our own conscious control.
HERE
Emptiness
As we continue falling, this love will lead us to a union with the existence expressing through the object which opened the window of love and awareness. Union does not involve possession, it involves surrender of a separate self. When union is reached, love rises as one in service to the world. This circulation depends on our vigilance in honoring love over the fear-based wants and needs of the conscious mind as it tries to regain absolute control.
This circulation can happen with another human being. But this is actually the sacred circulation which happens with every aspect of ourselves that has become divided. Through love, we transform and reunite with our own shadows. Through love, our lesser self identity dissolves back into who we truly are. Through love, we become one with existence in any form.
Three layers of falling in love
Consciousness: Recognition
Through the window of conscious we recognize the other. Firstly, we become conscious of its otherness – that it is outside of ourselves. Later, we recognize that this is part of who we are. We recognize and aspect of experience, or a person, as we would recognize a long distant family member, an old pain, or another human being on a desert island/
Awareness: Remembering
Through remembering, we enfold the “other” into membership of all we are. We being them into the level of the heart, recognizing not just the whole form, but each and every form within the form, including the ways and manners of the form. When we remember, we bring the “other” home in the world of experience.
Emptiness: Reunion
As we move through recognition and remembering into a deeper and deeper blend with the “other”, its existence as separate from who we are dissolves. With this separation, there is also a dissolution of fear. In the allowance of reunion, love can begin to birth a new form into creation – through togetherness.
OK. If you got this far, then you deserve a little about the romantic factor. When we fall in love with another person, existence is recognizing itself in human form, which allows an incredible opening of the heart and the window of awareness. As we engage with them, we begin a shared process, in which all that has been rejected in ourselves begins to be healed through love. When two people are sincere in this, and constantly choose to allow love over the control of the mind, beauty will manifest through relationship – an overflowing cup of love with a deep capacity for service to the world.
